Thoughts

I've been thinking alot lately about everything. More about why it seems like I've been on a string of bad luck since I went to Vietnam and brought K home. I tried to think did I cross someone while over there and had some curse put on me to cause all this but I couldn't think of anyone. And then I think there has to be some bigger plan that I just don't know about yet. The sad part is I'm a control freak and would really love to know what that plan is and how it will be revealed. About a week ago, I decided to just try and not worry about it because he has always provided for us. Which in turn has drove my Mom nuts because she is freakin out because how bad things are. And most of you know me that religion hasn't been a driving factor in my life, I believe, I pray, I go to church on a not to regular basis but I do try to live my life as a good person. My Grandpa taught me alot in his finally years and it wasn't that you had to sit in church every Sunday to believe in God or be a good Christian because at the time he was too frail from the cancer that had spread thought his whole body to make the trip to church. I learned more from the talks we would have almost every weekend while he sat in his recliner and I on the ugly beige couch about everything in life and I treasure each and every one of those moments we had together. So here I am laying it all out and giving it to God because I know somehow he will be able to take care of us. Wow, I didn't intend this to become a post about religion because I usually don't put my beliefs out in public that often except to ask for prayers. Which praying is something that every religion out there does.

I went to a job fair on Friday and a different one on Saturday. The one on Friday went well but not sure how fast they are hiring. The one on Saturday, well basically you were hired on the spot, needless to say I didn't make it past the first set of interviews because I didn't have enough manufacturing experience, they liked that I had a background in drafting and I had warehouse experience but just not enough. I could have screamed because we were there for 4 1/2 hours and walked away empty handed.

I've also been thinking alot lately that I haven't been a really good friend, I have been so wrapped up in the downwards spiral that is my life to realize that there are other people who I love that need a word or two or a great big hug from me once and a while. So here it goes....

A great big hug to Corey, David, Luke, Grandma J for finally bringing Sarah home and give Sarah a great big kiss from us too. Shelby, even thought we haven't talked that much lately you know your like a sister to me, so I'm here for you no matter how wrapped up in my own life I get. Amy give Samuel a great big hug & kiss and I promise we will catch up soon! Sara & Cindy, I wish I could give you a fast pass with China because you both have waited so long but all I can tell you is that the minute Mia & Samantha are in your arms this will all be a really bad memory. Stef, sorry I haven't written as much as I should have, thanks for always being there through all the good and bad! And to the rest of my friends and acquaintances, I love you!

Playing Foosball while waiting for Mommy to get out of the interview

Trying to reach the microwave